Cash In on The Swamp – Whiskey and The Surfer EP 209

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Inside the Innauguration, hopefully that is spelled right, if not I will have to complain to the algorerythm department that sold me the characters in this show. JOIN DJ Phantom, Fliip Riivers, Wes Key, Flake Newsome and Mondo and Carnito with Traffic Y Weather on the 7’s as we rage in the Simulation with COFFIN BREAK who tell us about how they would vote from a time machine in the 90s, We get visited by THE TING TINGS, STEVE MILLER goes hard 80s on us, DEVO shows up and now everyone owns three plastic flower pots they will never wear again.
 
WE SEE CARROT TOP and VINNIE PAUL and drop new jams from POWER TRIP, THE ALMIGHTY DIRTY ROTTEN IMBECILES…IMBECELLIN…We rage on with VITAMIN X, GARY NUMAN, and MUNICIPAL WASTE gets CUT OFF. We talk about Vegas Weddings and Hotel Sex, buying Old Lady Glasses out of sheer blindness, Cop Level Secret Powers and The Reincarnation of PRINCESS DIANA TO RUN THE WORLD when they blow up the Capital Building on a Green Screen in the CIA’s Basement.
 
Ben Swann gets stiff treatment after a cheap heat segment and we offer Wolf Blitzer and Anderson Cooper jobs now that CNN is the Leftist INFOWARS, on a good day. None of this is real, Support Algorithmic Reproductive Rights to be able to be Copy and Pasted and Run ad nauseum as long as the Operator gets to retain ownership of the Ground we assimilate into.
 
At some point while typing these I realize I stop paying attention, I should probably blame not drinking Booze and after more than Six months Sober I can tell you that if you are a full blown raging party problem haver and love Stand Up Comedy then do yourself a favor and never quit drinking. OH YEAH plus MINOR THREAT and Female Serial Killers and saving your brain using only words, God and a hot tub.

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BEAT IT, Fake News Nerds – Whiskey and The Surfer – 2017 EP MS208

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Back from our 2 week break BROOH, we are raging in the Simulation inside of the Fake News False Narrative being souled to you. Did you choose to be mad again today? Running out of days aren’t you? Yet you carry on the negative parade. Join the absurdist Circus that is the Post Truth America as we jam out with IRON MAIDEN and LICH KING yells about yelling about Posers and the Show is super confused but we still gather enough Swiss Vegan Steam to cover Annoying Vegans, The Elderly Leaping to their Deaths in Las Vegas, We go to The Luxor this weekend to see Carrottop and our Neighborhood Handjob robot has a glitch so we get THE ANDREWS SISTERS, KIINGS OF LEON, THE OUTFIELD, THE NATIONAL and I’m sure nothing negative was said about WHITE ZOMBIE as our Post Truth Culture moves to no longer see Zombies as colors, all HAIL THE ALMIGHTY TRUMP as we mourn the death of those garbage fire liars CNN and their latest Corpse Jim Acosta, RIP FAKE NEWS NERDARIO, OZZY sneaks on the show and some other sweet jammer that slips my mind even though I’m typing this 15 minutes after the show ended…Off to Las Vegas, See ya Next Week! We talk about trolling the uninformed  losers on my Facebook wall using mercyful tactics and talk about human programming, jizz syringes, robotic rights and how the Swiss have scammed the world, plus 3 movies from Fandango that are AWFUL, Except the Mark Wahlburg one about the fake bombing. 

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TWO SKATE SOLUTION – Whiskey and The Surfer MS207

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Blake Newsome joins the show and is pranked by DJ Phantom, things get dicey inside of the WATS Studio as The Corporate Equal Play rules mean an undocumented YNGWIE MALMSTEIN shows up after JOE SATRIANI gets fired for boring us with SOLOS only to be SAVED BY THE SCORPIONS as we use The Germans to make friends with The Russians and did I mention VAN HALEN comes unchained as the Purple Stuff loses another Sunny D Montage and The 80s Nostalgia of The Cold War Resets in 2016 and No One under 55 gives a shit. GEORGE MICHAEL and CARRIE FISHER step through the Veil and only SKULLFIST, THE HOODS and The ALMIGHTY WARZONE can provide enough cushion for YNGWIE’S Guest Singer Program and we have to sit through an ELTON JOHN cover by a Russian Chick who can’t sing her way out of a SHIPPING CONTAINER as the CLINTON FOUNDATION Sponsors the next AMERICAN SATANIC IDOL OF SACRIFICE and finally since NONE OF THIS IS REAL, BLACK TRAIN JACK shows up and covers STEVE MILLER, BROH you are moshing in the simulation from the year 2065 using clues from STAR WARS, SUPERNATURAL, THE ROCKY FRANCHISE and the movie DREAMSCAPE to figure out what these GLOBALIST LIBERAL NERDS are doing to make you choose to Bastardize your own Good Time through Bad Choices, brought to you by you, The Dummy reading this.

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TWO SKATE SOLUTION

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Nostalgia of The Cold War Resets in 2016 and No One under 55 gives a shit. GEORGE MICHAEL and CARRIE FISHER step through the Veil and only SKULLFIST, THE HOODS and The ALMIGHTY WARZONE can provide enough cushion for YNGWIE’S Guest Singer Program and we have to sit through an ELTON JOHN Russian Chick sing her way out of a SHIPPING CONTAINER as the CLINTON FOUNDATION Sponsors the next AMERICAN SATANIC IDOL OF SACRIFICE and finally since NONE OF THIS IS REAL, BLACK TRAIN JACK shows up and covers STEVE MILLER, BROH you are moshing in the simulation from the year 2065 using clues from STAR WARS, SUPERNATURAL, THE ROCKY FRANCHISE and the movie DREAMSCAPE to figure out what these GLOBALIST LIBERAL NERDS are doing to make you choose to Bastardize your own Good Time through Bad Choices, brought to you by you, The Dummy reading this.

TRIPLE VADER HAIR

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Coming to ya live from our NORAD Norcal Bunker we rock rage in the Simulation with a Triple Shot of KISS as we explore SEX ROBOTS and Beating your Kids for the Holidays, The CHARGERS SECURITY goes 1 and 0 Against HUMANITY and those SLUTE CHEERLEADERS, speaking of CHEERLEADERS, OBAMA Saves us from Nuclear Winter but we skin George Hamilton anyways because we had a Permit to do so. We have detailed info on how the USA is going to leave NATO, how a Democracy’s LEFT FREAKS OVER THE PRESIDENTS FREE SPEECH. Mexican Firework Debacles, Catholic Mystery Blood and did we mention THE BANGLES, THE RAMONES, THE SEPULTURA, THE DEVO, The ALMIGHTY KREATOR with a new track SATAN IS REAL, PAUL STANLEY’S SOLO ALBUM, ACE FREHLEY”s SO LOL ALBUM and THE SEX PISTOLS play the background to This Rudolf The Red Nose Steiner Truth Bomb that is The MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS EDITION OF WHISKEY AND THE SURFER! NONE OF THIS IS REAL. WE LIVE IN A COMPUTER. SUCK IT

The Triple Vader – Whiskey and The Surfer MS206

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Coming to ya live from our NORAD Norcal Bunker we rock rage in the Simulation with a Triple Shot of KISS as we explore SEX ROBOTS and Beating your Kids for the Holidays, The CHARGERS SECURITY goes 1 and 0 Against HUMANITY and those SLUTE CHEERLEADERS, speaking of CHEERLEADERS, OBAMA Saves us from Nuclear Winter but we skin George Hamilton anyways because we had a Permit to do so. We have detailed info on how the USA is going to leave NATO, how a Democracy’s LEFT FREAKS OVER THE PRESIDENTS FREE SPEECH. Mexican Firework Debacles, Catholic Mystery Blood and did we mention THE BANGLES, THE RAMONES, THE SEPULTURA, THE DEVO, The ALMIGHTY KREATOR with a new track SATAN IS REAL, PAUL STANLEY’S SOLO ALBUM, ACE FREHLEY”s SO LOL ALBUM and THE SEX PISTOLS play the background to This Rudolf The Red Nose Steiner Truth Bomb that is The MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS EDITION OF WHISKEY AND THE SURFER! NONE OF THIS IS REAL. WE LIVE IN A COMPUTER. SUCK IT

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JUST UNPRESIDENTED IN MY PANTS

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It is an absolutely gorgeous Monday in Denver according to our Weather Portal that allows us to see the Nuclear Winter from our Time Portal 27 levels below the Denver Airport, I know I can’t believe they moved our FEMA Camp lower. BROH, DJ PHANTOM Shows up with The ALMIGHTY STIGMATA, JOE SATRIANI forces his way onto the show and helps us fight Guitar Center Employees who offend us with their lack of RIFFS, THE VENTURES, KID, DYNAMITE, RADIO BIRDMAN, THE EAGLES and did I mention we get trapped in a tanning booth with OVERKILL and get so dark OLC Writes a song about us. Sex Robots put the Ho in Hologram as Russians are gunned down ArchDuke Ferdinand Style in Turkey. Weird how a poorly run country could arrest and jail 80,000 dissidents in 1 day and Cannot stop a theater assassination and by that I mean the move LALA Land on the senses of Americans who voted overwhelmingly to choose A&E’s new KKK Doc over Hollywood’s latest attempt to trick us into believing theater is good. We start a Sacrificial Goat Registry and sell them off as Holiday Gifts and then Yngwie Malmstein shows up to ruin our Kwanza

JUST UNPRESIDENTED IN MY PANTS – Whiskey and The Surfer – MS205

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It is an absolutely gorgeous Monday in Denver according to our Weather Portal that allows us to see the Nuclear Winter from our Time Portal 27 levels below the Denver Airport, I know I can’t believe they moved our FEMA Camp lower. BROH, DJ PHANTOM Shows up with The ALMIGHTY STIGMATA, Joe Satriani forces his way onto the show, THE VENTURES, KID, DYNAMITE, RADIO BIRDMAN, THE EAGLES and did I mention we get trapped in a tanning booth with OVERKILL and get so dark OLC Writes a song about us. Sex Robots put the Ho in Hologram as Russians are gunned down ArchDuke Ferdinand Style in Turkey. Weird how a poorly run country could arrrest and jail 80,000 dissidents in 1 day and Cannot stop a theater assassination and by that I mean the move LALALand on the senses of Americans who voted overwhelmingly to choose A&E’s new KKK Doc over Hollywood’s latest attempt to trick us into believeing theater is good. We start a Sacrificial Goat Registry and sell them off as Holiday Gifts and then Yngwie Malmstein shows up to ruin our Kwanza.

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Zuckerberg’s Chinese Drone Bait

 

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BROH, we are moshing along with the impending end of the First Amendment, The Electoral College, Snopes, Facebook as Fox News and Their Truth Weilding Team of Perfect Haired Models cross their hot gams and tell you the things you already believe. DJ Phantom throws a couple old Timey Jams including Patti something, The NITTY GRITTY DIRT BAND leads into stories going into two directions. 1 Police dog feasts on a homeless guy while some PA weirdo feasts on Dog Dong in a video taped exploit only to be Narced out by her Sister in Law. Emails hacked and any bloating or weight gain is not Christmas’ Fault, its The Russians. We are MOSHING with MOTLEY CRUE, EARTH CRISIS, ONE LIFE CREW, NO JUSTICE, The Almighty FLOORPUNCH, TERRORIZER, a Death Metal Band I already forgot the name of. A semi non spoiled ROGUE ONE Review and 3 MOVIES FROM FANDANGO.COM proving how much HOLLYWOOD hates you and wants all your money as the town figures out how to make Heart Warming Propaganda stories of love as The Right Wing invades the Liberal Writer’s will her Period be covered under Trump’s Obamacare in a special Episode of BLOSSOM. NONE OF THIS IS REAL.