Allah wanted was Amazon Doormats

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Amazon Employee tries to leap to their death only to land on a pile of discarded Allah Doormats after online protests had them removed from the site while the crosses and stars get to stick around.  Donald Trump takes issue with Symbolic Speech, Blood Suckers turn a two person love orgy into a Crime Scene and the Police are bummed they can’t shoot anyone. Australia leads the way with Human Microchipping, ease of access until Hackers and by that I mean dudes with Machetes cut your chip out and use your Hand like a garage door opener to your SOUL. Did I mention MOSH? The DWARVES cover THE RAMONES, MINISTRY makes it show debut, THE KNIFE AND OLIVIA NEWTON JOHN come through the Request Line, DJ Phantom counters with BOLT THROWER, MX MACHINE, SEPULTURA and ANTHRAX. Information on how to join our Alpha Mail Christmas Card Program, Fliip starts a business selling a Macebased Sex Lube to sell to FEMA Camps which causes chaos inside of the Corporate structure which is the NONE OF THIS REAL Simulation of http://www.Whiskeyandthesurfer.com found at http://www.sexpotcomedy.com
https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/whiskey-and-the-surfer/id812743086?mt=2

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What’s Somali with You?

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In the year 2065, two AM morning guys make the move to FM using a time portal, a microwave and Direct TV as they warn America of its impending doom from a hidden Bunker in their FEMA Camp 17 levels below the Denver Airport.  The world is heating up like a jock jams rally cry as the OSU Campus is awash in the blood of bad Ref Calls and the Karma from their cheating comes home to roost in the name of FAKE NEWS. Shootings reported to gain eyes downgrading to stabbing as it finds its way into the swisscheese of the minds and hearts of an electorate about to be put through the Recount Ringer as both sides make money selling Democracy and AD time and make sure an agitated, scared populace continues to spend LIKE THERE IS NO TOMORROW. We talk about Russian Holocaust Denier Figure Skating and why Clint Malarchuk is the Hero in our new Icecapades Terror on Ice as we bring awareness to Global Warming through interpretive Assisted Suicide. DID I mention BONUS SONGS!!!  F Yeah Double Shots from NO WARNING, KING DIAMOND, BIOHAZARD, BAD RELIGION, MERCYFUL FATE, EXCITER, RAZOR and CELTIC FROST. Nick Cannon breaks down the truth of Eugenics via TMZ…Zach Galafinakis prepares us for Hillary’s Presidential Installment and also, NONE OF THIS IS REAL. Have Fun, Stay Absurd, Rate, Review, Share, Love, Lust, and be the ROCKY IV Here of your life and let the strength of Bridget Nielsen take us into a new tomorrow.
http://www.johntole.com/blog USE THE AMAZON LINK
ANARCHY, CHAOS, CANIIBALISM and more mosh this Week!
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Please Pass The Propaganda

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Whiskey and The Surfer is Alternative Reality Programming. The show is hosted by DJ Phantom, JLJ, Wes Key and Fliip Riivers with contributions from Writer’s Strike Johnny Carson and Mondo and Carnito who do Weather and Traffic on the Sixes.
Using the tattered remnants of the First Amendment and a rigged Time Portal hidden 17 levels below the Denver Airport, 2 AM Morning Guys, Wes Key and Fliip Riivers (Whiskey and The Surfer) rock rage in the year 2065 using science, the occult, weird news, agorithms and the sweet riffs of metal, thrash, hardcore and 80s Pop to save America and Her Freedom and Liberties 1 sick hot ass riff at a time.
It is the day before Thanksgiving and we are calling it a week only to return Monday. The Mainstream Media will let you know that your family dinner is a place for war, division, arguing and strife as the move to dismantle the family unit and replace it with a Safe Space Inner Metropolis Tribalist unit where a Village will raise the same child it sacrifices to Baal to rain down sweet MEMES to keep the huddled masses huddled en masse, blindfolded by the Flag which once stood for freedom, now handpainted like a Going Out of Business Sale that is the Waterbeds and Stuff Store Model this country is fast becoming.
Arm yourself with a Shiv, a Bible, The Koran, a DAPL Job Application, grandma’s recipes, a copy of Mein Kampf to keep Uncle Carmine busy, Ayn Rand for the kids table, plus Crayons and Glitter for the Bernie Bros losing their kids college funds on, “NO kids for us Bro!, The Future is Important.”
also,
None of this is Real
We Live in a Computer and only the SICK ASS MOSH FROM DJ PHANTOM as she drops and goes HARD with The Godfather’s AGNOSTIC FRONT and the Almighty SICK OF IT ALL, she drops in some WEEKEND NACHOS, BENCHPRESS, EMPIRE OF RATS and GOD FORBID covers MERAUDER like a BOSS, plus some Y&T because we gotta throw the Bay Area some love as we chew on edibles and search The Tri-Valley for sweet Yams, Hard Mosh and an open Starbucks.

Contagious Memes

 

 

DJ Phantom rock rages us with RKL, REDEMPTION 87, TERRORIZER, RINGWORM, TESTAMENT and some sweet ass riffs from JLJ, Wes Key, Fliip Riivers and The Almighty Y&T. Guy runs himself over in his car, Guy lights himself on fire in the name of Corporate Coffee, Guy stabs his Dad to avoid Circumcision and Astronauts see gnarly ass lights and shit, Alien Disclosure forthcoming as we move from the family unit into a Nativist Tribal Culture of Warring Factions so pray your Memes are Dank or the See More unregulated school bus you get sent off to your camp in will not have seatbelts with pickable locks. Is your core engaged? Have you deeply considered TCOFY. One more show this week, so get ready for Wed, loosen that belt, work on your chest and rage on with your bad self.

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Hate Free Movie Friday

 

Choas Magic and the Memeing of The Evil Depths of people being funny on the internet. Where does it lead, Next on Donahue. This show is thrash tasted, metal mother approved and we’ve got MADBALL, MAIDEN, BACKTRACK, WISDOM IN CHAINS, then DJ Phantom knows a travel day is here and tosses in some J. Geils, Loverboy and some Acoustic KISS. ICE HOUSE TONIGHT, 10PM. Also new wage gaps are found, we see The Arrival or whatever that movie was I kept forgetting to talk about. Anyways, don’t See More miss the forest for the trees and watch as the language changes around you like a demon infested Argentian SummerCamp for World Leaders who love bonfires, burning effigies and their own private water suppy and standing army.

 

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Creeps and Desserters

Why not take the time it takes to charge your phone just a mere 5% and chill and let your breath happen. Hey try it, be a goof and have fun, none of this is real at any level. Starbucks Video real or fake? Global Warming Real or Fake? College Outrage to get rid of the Electoral College, who wins when Politics changes the rules and drives traffic to its centralized end. Will the Populist Popularity Contest run on or will a young star named Art Acevedo step up to become beloved City by City along the Gulf Coast as he becomes the new Grand Chancellor of New South America, either way, comedy and citizen shootings run hand in hand through the 4th of July Picnic that is Austin’s Celebration that the regime ended. We have a mysterious plane who flew over Denver yesterday and now its a Winter Paradise, more facts, guesses and the Prize Van Promo code will be available from Mondo Carnito with Traffic y Tiempo on the SIXES. DID WE MENTION, BLOOD FOR BLOOD, IRON MAIDEN, THE ALMIGHTY SKARHEAD by request along with SLEIGH BELLS and we would like to be apologize for THE GHETTO BOYS for not coming to mind during our HOUSTON related discussion. A dude dissolved in ACID at a National Park in JUNE and the story broke today on CNN as Clinton Aids practice their enemy disposal.

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SOD Has All The ANSWERS

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Here we go again like a Whitesnake montage and we don’t have enough insurance to keep denting these hoods. Speaking of today, HOODS, new jams from POWER TRIP, The Replacements, REACH THE SKY, SOD, AFI, THE NSA, THE CIA, THE FBI are all moshing in their cubicles with their spying jobs being extended indefinitely like a Dentention, I don’t feel tardy, We mosh on with ANTHRAX and talk about Steve Bannon, Breitbart, the Native American Protests, Pipeline Issues, what the end game is and how to get hella more hot tub time inside of the Simulation. SETTINGS:SHARK:SPACE:FUCKSWITH:HELLA:11

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How High is Your New Fence Gonna Be?

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Bro we are raging with MOTLEY CRUE, CROWN OF THORNZ, MUNICIPAL WASTE, REM gets snuck in on us, like a hard charging CIA bag man just making a name for himself in the new regime. Corruption, intrigue, plus Mondo and Carnito with the Weather and Traffic on the SIXES, we rage out with some KEEL and of course the Almighty RAW DEAL. Will virtual reality change our eyes in the same way emoji has connected to the zenith of cultural emotion. Sweden installs a mansplaining line and the story does a great job as instilling Islamic Fear through Europe and everyone else dumb enough to click on that shiny jewel of Propaganda. Check out the book Propaganda, written in 1928, talks about Mind Control, advertising and how Radio might react. Telling. Went to kickboxing last night, I feel good, this is the year my stomach moves to Canada instead of Mexico. USA. I would like to apologize to the singer of Grim Reaper for comparing my body to Vince Neil’s and also none of this is real. Welcome to the Simulation.

COMING AT YOU LIVE!

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13 Whiskey and The Surfer Shows left for 2016, closing out on our first 200 Show Season 1. Coming back to you in January but until then we have TESLA, BON JOVI, SPUDMONSTERS, NUCLEAR ASSAULT, Something terrible from the 90s that isn’t one of my bands (redundant). Swedish Chef finds out what the Muslim word for Haymaker is as he catches a sweet beat down for looking like DJT. Swedish Chef’s hat has been hiding Trumps wig and we’ve known it since the 70s. MKULTRA back in the news and by that I mean the Mind Control and not some Kommisar Tea House you snap at during Poetry and Authentic Digital Ethnic Self Expression Night, Promocode:ShhhhhhI’mreadingsomethingthatmakesmemad Soros parading protestors into the oncoming riots, Minimum Wage workers enjoying that Christmas Bonus and trading Faces for Burgers in the Spit Session of their Venom. Are we doomed? Probably. Are we being manipulated by outside forces? Does advertising really work? Use the amazon link at http://www.whiskeyandthesurfer.com and http://www.johntole.com/blog Perhaps your current opinion has been drilled into you since you of Television Age. Keep watching, you’ll be dead one day and realize you missed AGAIN, you’ll be back, they always come back. Be it the closing of Nirvana or the Heart of Christ, what are you doing to ascend inside of this Holographic Simulation we call America?